When the Web Gets Personal ... In a Good Way

I'd first like to say I appreciate your patience with my non-blogging this week. I celebrated my 34th birthday and decided my gift to myself would be a short blog hiatus. I took the extra time to keep hammering away on a re-write of a current project and to basically enjoy life. 

Here's how I know you guys and gals are great: I get comments telling me how fabulous the comments are! Half the time they don't even mention my post. : ) 

Which is cool with me, because I already know how groovy y'all are. I feel like such a leech at times because I seriously get so much more from your thoughts than my own. 

Speaking of comments, there were so many awesome ones on my last post I'm still trying to get back around to everyone to say thanks.  So thank you. THANK you. THANK YOU. And I'll be visiting your blogs soon ...


Actually, the point of this post is to say another thank you. This thanks goes to Alex Cavanaugh for once again proving that this Internet thing can be real. 

The people we interact with Online all too often seem like phantoms. They fade in and out with comments and Tweets. It feels as though we can't touch them in any meaningful way. We realize they can't touch our 'REAL' lives either, but we're aware of them all the same. 

I think the phantom mentality helps keep things in a healthy psychological place. After all, what do we really know about these people? Sure, we've been talking at each other--in some cases--for years. We've gleaned enough information from things they've shared on Facebook or blogs to know a little about what their offline lives are like. 

We grow close in a casually acquainted sort of way.

But here's the reality: If that blog follower we've known for years suddenly disappeared tomorrow, never to comment again, what could we do about it? In most cases, absolutely nothing. Most of us haven't met each other in real life. We wouldn't know who to call, or what to say even if we could find them. 

It's a two-way street. If someone quits following our blog, or says something mean about us in a review, it stings a little. Especially if it's someone you've interacted with for a while. We promote each other. We comment. But just like all relationships, things can sour. Unlike other relationships, the Web-Life rarely gives an explanation or opportunity for rebuttal.

People are here one instant, gone the next. 



My favorite 'ghost' song...

As such, it's probably better to think of the people we interact with Online as ghosts. They can be friendly. They can be scary. But ultimately they can't really hurt or help us. They're just there. We're all just there.

To be honest, there are times when I think that sucks. Even if it is true and for the best. 

I'm a people kind of guy. I'm the person who talks to strangers at the store. I ask people I don't know about their kids, how their day has gone, etc. I smile with them, try to make them laugh if I can tell they're having a crap day. Just who I am. 

Sometimes this Internet thing is just a little too impersonal for my taste. I feel like I'm building paper relationships that are apt to blow away with the first stiff breeze. And for the most part that's probably accurate. 

As much as I want you to know I'm a nice guy, I mean what I say, and I truly want the best for you and your endeavors, I understand if it doesn't hold much weight. It simply can't. The minute you allow yourself to believe that, then you also have to be willing to believe me--on some small level--if I suddenly say you suck.

That's just more of a risk than most of us are willing to take with complete strangers. And rightfully so.

Then you meet people like Alex. They go so far above and beyond the normal Web pleasantries and protocol that it makes you rethink the concept of friendship. 

You realize you can truly grow to respect and enjoy someone you've never even talked to. You realize you can have an impact on people, because they have an impact on you. They make you see that you can sometimes trust strangers, so it makes you want to keep trying to be real in return.

Sometimes it does work.

I'm pretty sure most of you follow Alex and know all about the swell guy he is, so I won't bother with much of things we already know. I'll just say that I don't think there's a more real person I've met, Online or off. 

He does stuff that no one else takes the time to do, and he does it without asking for anything. In a system (blogging, social media, etc.) built on the "I'll scratch your back..." philosophy I can't tell you how refreshing that is. 

So cheers, Alex. Thanks for helping me keep my heart in this Web stuff, even when it seems like it doesn't have a place. 

~EJW~