IWSG - Time Marches On

Hey, gang! Today marks the 3rd(!) anniversary of the Insecure Writer's Support Group. To say that this group has become a light of encouragement in our community is a gross understatement of its importance.

Like so many artists, writers are often ruled by our insecurities. Our desire to share our creativity with the world is often the very thing that terrifies us the most. Having this group of likeminded individuals--many of whom I look up to a great deal--sharing their trials and successes each month has sometimes been the only thing putting my butt back in the chair to keep writing.

So often I've felt that I was doing this writing thing wrong. That there was some piece to this cosmic puzzle that wasn't included with my set. Then, IWSG rolled around and I'd invariably find that ONE other writer who expressed exactly what I was feeling at any given time. And in our business, a small bit of affirmation can go a long way.

IWSG doesn't just give you spoonfuls of confidence and encouragement, it dishes it out in heaps. (There are over 300 members as of this post.) So if you've ever needed a boost, please click the pic below and give the group a look.

Time Marches On


My insecurity this month really isn't an insecurity, just more of a bitter fact of life. I can't control time for others, only what I do with my own. And I REALLY wish I could stop it altogether sometimes.

I live far enough from my 'growing up' home that I'm only able to visit most of my family once every 6 months (sometimes not even that). I'm the youngest of 4 children, my parents are elderly and not in great health. Every time I visit I wonder how much more time I'll have with them. My nieces and nephews grow an inch (or three) between every visit now. My siblings get a few more gray hairs and wrinkles. When you memorize everything about someone because you think about them all the time, it's jarring when your mental images no longer match up to the real thing.

I have a 15 year old chihuahua named Eddy. He has been by my side for many moves and adventures. I'm losing him, and I'd give just about anything to be able to hit a pause button and keep him with me for another 15 years. A dog that is able to grow old and die in a loving home is a lucky dog, because so many have hard, hard lives. But I'm still greedy enough to always want one more day with him.

We've lost some people in our writing-blogging community of late. People you see flash by in your feeds every day. People you've had conversations with. People who've lifted us up. We grow so accustomed to feeling their presence it's absolutely glaring when it's suddenly gone. My heart aches for their families, because I know they are feeling (x 1,000) what I am about time right now. We just need more of it with those we love. Always.

But that's not how life works. It keeps moving even if we stop.

Sometimes I listen to the wonderful Passenger song "Life's For The Living" when I get overwhelmed with these kinds of thoughts. The chorus really brings me back to the proper perspective.

Don't you cry for the lost
Smile for the living
Get what you need and give what you'r given
Life's for the living so live it
Or you're better of dead



Tears for what we've lost or missed are okay and good. But they won't give us any more time. It marches on and we have to try to keep up as best we can. We only have the moments we are given, and it's up to us to cherish them.

~EJW~

24 comments:

  1. I hate seeing my parents get old.
    Really sorry about Eddy. Our furry friends just don't live long enough.

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    1. It's hard to watch on both accounts. :(

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    2. And never heard back from you on my email - don't worry, I found someone else who could step in and help.

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  2. Time is a harsh mistress, the more you give the more she takes.

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  3. I'm sorry about Eddy. Our cat Spunky has terminal cancer and we just love on him and appreciate every day will still have with him.

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    1. I'm so sorry to hear about your cat, LD. You do hang on to every minute.

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    1. I know you do, Shelly. Why your posts lately have broken my heart. But I do think about your lovely hounds all the time. :)

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  5. Think of how full your life has been with your Eddy! Life gives us gifts and takes them away, but how much richer we are for the experiences.

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    1. You're absolutely right, Liza. I wouldn't trade my time with him for anything. It hurts so much losing them, but it's a small thing compared to the love and joy they bring.

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  6. You are always so spot-on with something helpful and heartfelt to say. Great post as always.

    Hugs, E.J. Our dog is fading away, too. I feel your pain.

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    1. Sorry to hear that, M. I've loved and remember every dog I've ever had. And it has killed me to lose all of them--to the point I always question if I can go through it again. But ultimately the joy they bring so outweighs the sadness at the end.

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  7. This is such a touching post, EJ. I am so sorry about Eddy. My cats were 12 and 15 when I had to say goodbye to them and I understand how heartbreaking it is. I'm also the youngest of 5 children and can relate to your feelings about your parents.
    Hugs to you.

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    1. It's a tough position to be in for sure, Julie. I know you have a huge heart for animals, too. I can't imagine my life without a dog in it. :)

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  8. So sorry to hear your pup is getting near his end. At least you can cherish every day you have left with him.

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    1. Thank you, Loni. I'm very grateful for every minute.

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  9. I'm sorry about your dog. Cherish whatever time he has left.

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  10. It's so tough sometimes. I think about it all the time with my parents--how I don't spend enough time with them and one day I'll not have the chance anymore. It's why I won't move out of FLA. I want to be there for them when they really need me.
    And don't get me started on my dog. He's only 5 but darn he's the bestest BFF I've ever had. Can't imagine him not being here either.
    Life is so fleeting.
    I hope you get to make the most of all your time with the ones you love. After it's all been said and done, there really is nothing else more valuable in this life.

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  11. I am so sorry about your dog. I've been thinking a lot about my family cat, Rosie. She's maybe 18-19 now, which as we know is older in cat years. She's not looking too good (blind and frail) but she's still strong and walking, which is why we haven't brought her to the vet, because I'd know what they say even though she's not sick.

    My mom is close to 70, but she looks 50, and she hates seeing these celebrities die who are around her age. She tells me, "It's scary." And I tell her, "You're going to live to be 100." But we never know, and I can't imagine my life without her.

    We really do need to cherish our loved ones.

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  12. There never seems to be enough time, unfortunately... :/

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  13. Loss, family and friends have been on my mind lately, especially after we lost Tina recently.

    May we always treasure our loved ones.

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  14. I'm so sorry about Eddie and Tina. In the past few years, so many of my friends have lost their parents, and it's just so sad. And it makes me wonder why I get to be so lucky. We have to appreciate every moment we have. Thanks for the reminder!

    -Vicki

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“Much unhappiness has come into the world because of bewilderment and things left unsaid.” ― Fyodor Dostoyevsky

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